of handicap matches and candy cane lanes
by comebackdean
Summary: there they were – two grown ass men, certified bad asses – running around yelling at these rich people to turn on their lights at their fancy houses, all so she would smile; the kind that nearly split her cute face in half and made her brown eyes sparkle [dean/renee/roman, holiday fluff]


_a/n: redsandman99 and i both talked about a roman/renee/dean poly-ship after renee interviewed them together on smackdown back when they were feuding with the wyatts. i love christmas and i love the idea of these three in a relationship, so here we are. the plot was inspired by the season one episode of new girl "the 23rd"_

 **~*~of handicap matches and candy cane lanes~*~**

 **pairing: dean ambrose/renee young/roman reigns**

 **summary: there they were – two grown ass men, certified bad asses – running around yelling at these rich people to turn on their lights at their fancy houses, all so she would smile; the kind that nearly split her cute face in half and made her brown eyes sparkle/ or the one where a block of houses called candy cane lane make dean, renee and roman realize what's been there all along [holiday fluff]**

 **rating: t**

* * *

It was _all_ she could talk about since they landed in LA to tape Smackdown; Candy Cane Lane. It was this stretch of houses in Silverlake, a neighborhood just outside the city – not far from Malibu and the beach – where people, every year, decked their houses to the nines for Christmas. Every night starting on November 27th, the day after Thanksgiving to December 26th, the day after Christmas, from 5:00 to 10:00, they turned on their lights and created _Candy Cane Lane_.

 _It's magical_ , she had whispered, eyes so aglow it was like they were powered by Christmas lights themselves.

"C'mon, you guys..." She all but begged, sticking that bottom lip out as she bounced on the balls of her feet. "It won't be any fun if I go by myself. Summer's being a Grinch cause Prince Pretty," She huffed. "Needs his beauty sleep, Brie's with Nikki and Daniel going glamping or whatever, Paige hates Christmas... I mean have you seen her ugly sweater? It's black and purple! _You_ ," She pokes Dean hard in the chest, glaring. "Won't let me hang out with Kevin any more..."

"Yeah," Dean scoffs, interrupting. "Cause Teddy Ruxbin, Murder Bear would go down to Candy Cane Lane."

"He's _not_ a murder bear." The petite blonde rolls her eyes. "He's sweet. You just have to get to know him. He does have a family, remember?"

"Not a murder bear, huh? Tell that to Sami's shoulder. Besides," Dean's eyes narrow. "He's got his grubby murder bear paws all over the IC title, which I'm gunnin' for, remember? That means he's the enemy cause you like me better." He puffed out his chest and jutted out his chin, looking like a proud little boy, which made Renee giggle.

"Who said I liked you better?" Teasing in a sing-song tone. "Maybe I'm waiting till after the holidays to let you down easy and admit that Kevin's my new favorite. Did you ever think about that, Deano?"

"Please. We all know _I'm_ your favorite. Even Romeo back there knows you like me best. After all, when he asked you for a hug and lookin' like a sad puppy you laughed at him and told him to eat a Snickers."

"That was a commercial, dumbass." It was the Samoan's turn to roll his eyes. "In real life, Renee," A smug smile graces his plush pink lips. "Would never turn _me_ down for a hug, would you, baby girl?"

There's that tell-tale shiver going up and down her spine while a rush of warmth curls in the pit of her stomach and she can't help but bite her lip and glance down at her bare feet. That stupid baritone voice. That dumb otherwise generic nickname. Ugh.

She knows her cheeks are flushing red, she can _feel_ the heat inside and she twists her bottom lip between her teeth. Instead of saying yes because she can feel the weight of Dean's eyes on her – those pretty cornflower eyes, which entice a whole other set of feelings that make complicated seem like the biggest understatement, ever – she slips back into the teasing rapport she has with both men.

"I dunno..." Sing song just like it was with Dean as she rocks back and forth on her heels, playing innocent. "It's not like you give the best hugs on the roster. I've been hugged by Becky, and she's only second to Bayley in the hug department. Big E's pretty good, Brie gives awesome hugs so does Bryan..." A put upon, exaggerated sigh. "I really miss his. So don't sound to confident there," A sympathetic pat to the very impressive curve of his large bicep. "Thor."

"Told ya," Dean's smug now, irresistible dimple appearing, which makes her heart skip several beats, ugh. "Nee likes me best."

"Really," Roman deadpans, shaking his head. "You're gonna stick your tongue out at me? JoJo don't even do that and she's seven. Cut that shit out, you're a grown ass man."

"Are you gonna make me? Cause I'd like to see you try."

Renee laughed, shaking her head as she watched the two of them shove at each other. Before Dean tried to give Roman a noogie, which lead to the more muscular of the two trying to get the leaner man into a head lock. The grappling went on for a good five minutes and finally she decided to step in. Wriggling her way between them, she gave them both her brightest smile and reached up to pinch their cheeks saying, "You know both of you are my favorites, which is why you're coming to Candy Cane Lane with me tonight."

"But Tink..." Dean whined. "Candy Cane Lane ain't exactly badass and Ro and I do have reps to protect."

"Oh, please," Now the petite blonde was the one scoffing. "What reps? Everyone knows you," She points at Dean. "Melt every time JoJo flashes those brown eyes at you and asks for piggy back rides and for you to play dress up. I have a picture," She shoved her phone in his face. "On this phone of you in a tiara, remember?"

Roman snickered as he remembered coming home to Dean and Renee playing dress up with JoJo. Whenever they had shows in and around Pensacola, the two always came over to spend time with his little girl who adored both the Canadian and the Cincinnati native.

"Don't think you're off the hook, Mr. Spare-No-One-Spear-Everyone. I have video," She shoved her phone in Roman's face this time. "Of you singing _'Let It Go'_ into a hairbrush. And coloring me a picture of Rapunzel to hang on my fridge back home. Some bad asses the both of you are. You're coming to Candy Cane Lane and that's final. Meet me at the Range Rover. We'll have plenty of time to be there before they start shutting down the lights so we can drive slow. Or maybe we'll park the Rover and walk, I haven't decided yet."

As Renee walked off – slim hips swaying enticingly with every step – both Roman and Dean were thinking the same thing; could she be any cuter, standing on the tips of her toes and getting into their faces?

* * *

 _Arms. Arms. Arms. Arms._ Did she mention arms? Because, arms. Big arms with muscle bulging and flexing in every inch.

Renee could not stop the wistful sigh escaping her lips as Dean and Roman came around the corner, the Usos trailing behind, so they could film their brief backstage segment. Damn wardrobe for having Roman in tank tops just like Dean's now. She could only handle so much, and it was so hard to concentrate; all that muscle on display. She was, after all, only human.

Quickly she forgot about the delectable biceps on display as she remembered she was about to be the barer of bad news. Stephanie's throaty voice was suddenly in her ear. _Oh and Renee don't forget to break the good news to Roman; Dean and the Usos are band from ringside during his main event match against the League of Nations._

In her mind's eye she could still see those glossy lips twisting into a triumphant sneer. Her blood simmered – not from being close to Roman and Dean – but from how she had wanted to just reach up and get a good handful of Stephanie's russet curls and _yank_. Or maybe rear back and give the Billionaire Princess a taste of her own medicine with a good, hard slap across the face.

Of course she never would. She loved her job too much. Not to mention she was supposed to remain neutral at all times. Not that everyone didn't know those two were her favorites. Her weak spots. Knowing Stephanie McMahon she probably [definitely] took some sadistic glee in making Renee be the one to deliver the news. It's not like she, herself, as co-head of The Authority didn't know that her primary backstage interviewer favored Roman and Dean. The very men she and her husband were trying to destroy every night.

"Roman," Slipping into her professional facade as she gazed into steel hardened grey eyes. He had his game face on, belying the warm heart that beat in that strong chest, making him look like a warrior going off to battle vs the friendly, warm and loving man she knew underneath. "Tonight you're facing The League of Nations alone in the Main Event on Smackdown. Unfortunately, your good friend Dean Ambrose," She knew 'good friend' didn't come close to how Roman _actually_ felt about Dean. "And your cousins the Usos couldn't come through against The New Day, so by order of The Authority - specifically, Stephanie McMahon, you will be forced to compete in a four on one handicap match. What is going through your mind right now?"

"I know what The Authority wants from me; they want me to be angry that I'm facing The League of Nations alone, that I am in this four on one handicap match, and they don't want me to be angry at them because they made the stipulation, they want me to be angry at these guys right here. At my family," He pounds fists with Jimmy and Jey. "At my brother and my best friend," He and Dean give each other a one armed hug like they did earlier. "But they obviously don't know me. I'm not angry. I'm focused, determined and I'm gonna get through that handicap match and take out every one of those guys by myself. I told you once before it's One Vs All, but that ain't the truth. I got my family lookin' out for me. I got cousins who are more like brothers and I got a best friend who means as much to me as my own brother. Sheamus made himself a nice little stable – a King of the Ring in Barrett, US Champ in Del Rio and a Bulgarian Brute like Rusev – but they ain't gonna lay down their lives for him. I know Jimmy, Jey and Dean will do whatever it takes for me; run through the New Day, hell run through a brick wall if they have to. Sheamus don't have that. And these guys... they know I'd do the same for them."

"Don't worry, bro, we got you." Jimmy assures, pounding his fist against Roman's shoulder.

"We always have your back, bro. That's what family's all about." Jey repeats Jimmy's actions.

"You got nothin' to worry about, Big Man, in two seconds the Usos and I will be ringside." Dean smirks, pounding his fist into his hand.

Renee swallows thickly and there's Stephanie's voice again, haunting her. She looks between the four men, suddenly feeling a wave of guilt wash over her. Her throat bobs unsteadily and there's a chill moving over her skin, goosebumps appearing on her arms underneath the gauzy blouse she's wearing.

"I..." She starts, lump forming in her throat, but she forges on; she's a professional, and needs to act like one right now more than ever. Even if her heart is breaking. "Once The New Day were announced the winners of the six man tag match, I received word from Stephanie McMahon herself that Dean Ambrose and the Usos are banned from ringside during tonight's Main Event four on one handicap match."

Renee immediately shut her eyes after shakily announcing Stephanie's stipulation. Dean's reaction wasn't pretty and it wasn't something she wanted to see. She could tell from the banging against the production crates that his fists were flying. The Usos managed to calm him down and all three wished Roman good luck before the camera crew disappeared, leaving her and the big man alone.

* * *

Slowly, her eyes opened and she couldn't help but apologize. "I'm sorry about tonight. I thought about yanking Stephanie's hair out by the roots or slapping her across the face, y'know," She sniffled a little, peering at soulful grey orbs through the fringe of her lashes. "Giving her a taste of her own medicine, but I like my job. Y'know just a little."

Suddenly, without even blinking, she was folded into impressive arms. Her face buried into a thick chest, her nose unable to stop busing the fabric of his shirt and inhaling his crisp, clean sent. Would there ever be a safer feeling than being completely surrounded by everything that was Roman Reigns? She doubted it.

"I'd _love_ to see you," Pulling away with a low rumbling chuckle and she can't help but pout. Being surrounded by him was such a wonderful feeling. "Give the Billionaire Bitch an ear drum poppin', we can't," He tilts her chin upward, thumb sliding across the apple of her cheek. "Have you getting fired. Who would help me keep Dean in line? Jimmy'd only encourage him. Jey'd just be along for the ride. Tamina would end up super-kicking him in the face, Nae ain't got time to watch out for him and Sasha? She'd try to lock him into the Bank Statement and we both know that wouldn't end well for either of them. Sides," He gives a flirtatious wink. "I gotta have somethin' pretty to look at backstage."

"Shut up." She shoves at his chest as he laughs, bending to brush a kiss along the crown of her platinum hair.

"I got this. Sheamus and his cronies ain't got nothin' on me. Turn that frown upside down, we got Candy Cane Lane to visit later, remember?"

"Be careful. One Brogue Kick or Bull Hammer and this pretty face," She squeezes his cheeks before patting both of them. "Won't be so pretty any more."

Watching him go, broad shoulders squared, chiseled jaw set tight and those soulful eyes turned to hardened steel once again, she felt her stomach twisting and tumbling. All these feelings inside – not just for him, but Dean as well – were swirling and tangling and what was she going to do? She would end up having to choose, wouldn't she? But how could she possibly choose?

* * *

Her heart started to pound from the thought of choosing and she swore she was going to break out in hives and then there was another pair of strong arms suddenly wrapping themselves around her trim waist. These arms weren't as thick with muscles, but they were wonderful and sturdy in their own way. Big and solid. Just like the chest she could feel behind her back. Not a crisp and clean scent tickling her nose any more, but something just as enticing. It was richer, deeper and a little more gritty; stale cigarette smoke lingering behind Old Spice and something uniquely him.

Dean.

"He'll be okay, Tink. He'll get through the match and be the last one standing." A harsher but no less lingering kiss against the crown of her hair. "If anybody can do this, it's him. I taught him everything I know, after all."

Tilting back she can see the cocky smirk across pouty pink lips she could hear in his voice. A weight is lifted from her shoulders and she doesn't feel as bad about watching Roman's match now. As long as Dean will hold her hand, and to her surprise, he lets her fingers glide through his own with no protest.

* * *

Roman stands tall in the end; getting the win and Dean only lets go of her hand after Sheamus delivers a vicious brogue kick. Before the rest of his cronies can get to their feet, Jimmy and Jey are hot on Dean's feet as he rushes toward the ring, ready to save Roman from being beaten up after the bell has already rung and he's been declared the victor.

Dean and The Usos are able to chase off Barrett, Del Rio and Rusev. There's a stare down along with trash talk being shouted back and forth, Dean leaning over the edge of the rope while Roman focuses on Sheamus, not breaking gaze with the Irishman. Jimmy and Jey taunt Del Rio, Rusev and Barrett. The screen goes black after and everyone takes their leave from the ring, making their way backstage.

The clock isn't on Renee's mind. The hours since she pouted and demanded and begged have dwindled to almost nothing. Because of the west coast taping, Smackdown ended later than usual, which had slipped the platinum-haired pixie's mind. She didn't realize there wasn't enough time to make it to Candy Cane Lane before the lights shut off for the night.

All she could think about was Roman's match and how relieved she was that he won and that Dean and his cousins were able to chase off the rest of The League of Nations before things could get ugly. The last thing Roman needed was to be beaten up. She knew how important TLC was to him, how much he had been hurt – more like devastated – after Sheamus' cash in of his briefcase. She could still see his face; so broken down, all the hurt etched into those perfect eyes of his and how battered his body had been that night.

"Told you, baby girl," Boastful as those plush lips curl into that winning smile. And, seriously, her panties have completely melted, basically. "Sheamus and his cronies ain't got nothin' on me."

"I'm just happy you're in one piece. I didn't want to have to call JoJo and explain why her Daddy was all beaten up. Especially since she isn't around to kiss your boo-boos."

" _You_ could always kiss 'em for her."

"In your dreams maybe." Teasing with accompanied by a perfectly timed eye roll because it's easier than admitting she's wanted her lips on every inch of that caramel colored skinned body.

"If Tink's kissin' anybody's boo-boos they'll be _mine_. So step off, Romeo." Dean chimes in, elbowing the Samoan for good measure.

"We ain't talkin' about your fantasies, Deano. We're talkin' about reality." Roman elbows the Cincinnati native back.

"I'm not kissing _anyone's_ boo-boos. JoJo's the boo-boo kissing professional. Now, less talking and more moving. I am _not_ missing Candy Cane Lane because you two decided to have some stupid macho pissing contest about me kissing your boo-boos. Move it!" She slapped both of their butts and shoved them toward the locker room.

"You should ask a little nicer, Renee, and maybe we'd move a little faster." Dean mused, gritty tone, making electricity surge through her veins. "Also," He waggled his eyebrows up and down. "Don't you have some sexy Mrs. Clause outfit to change into for our little excursion to Candy Cane Lane?"

"Now, we _really_ are talking about your dreams." The Canadian drawled dryly. "Seriously, you guys," She pouted, stomping her feet. "Hurry up! I don't want to miss this! We won't be back here until after Christmas and it's gone, literally, like the day after!"

"You don't need no Mrs. Clause outfit. Just put on my ugly sweater and you'll be plenty festive." Another wink just as shiver inducing as the one from earlier.

" _Your ugly sweater_?" Dean looks insulted, clutching at his chest dramatically. "Who says she even _has_ your ugly sweater? She's obviously gonna be wearin' mine."

Their voices faded away as they continued down the long hallway to the locker room, Renee admiring the view until they finally disappeared.

* * *

"No... No... No." Utterly defeated from Renee, nothing but a mournful whisper as they approached the neighborhood, which instead of being sparkly and bright was dull and plain. They hadn't made it in time. The lights were shut off for the night. "We missed it." So soft, Dean and Roman weren't sure she had even said anything.

"I was going to take pictures so JoJo could see. One of the houses has a beach theme; light up palm trees like the ones in Florida and a seal in a santa hat and a dolphin elf. I was going to show my Dad the hockey one. My Mom said to take pictures of the house that won _The Great Christmas Light Fight_ last year. This really sucks."

Dean and Roman exchanged a look. This was so unlike their Renee. Neither one knew when – the exact moment, maybe there wasn't even one – she had become theirs, but she was. She had bounded into their life just as they were finding their footing in the company. She was all platinum curls – her hair was long then – bare feet, cartwheels, dumb jokes, burping contests [really] and skin tight dresses, flirty skirts, a sharp tongue but with kissable tulip lips, smooth porcelain skin and though she wasn't built like any of the Divas she was perfect in all the right places; pert breasts, just enough to fill their palms, a tight little ass, shapely legs.

Roman was about to turn around, to offer words of comfort for the platinum blonde, he could tell how much it meant to her to see the lights when suddenly Dean shut off the Rover's ignition and leaps from the driver's seat. Then both he and Renee could hear the Cincinnati native's gritty tone, yelling, as he cupped his hands around his mouth.

 **"HEY, YOU CHRISTMAS FREAKS, TURN ON THE DAMN LIGHTS! THERE'S A GIRL IN THIS CAR, A REALLY GREAT GIRL THAT WANTS TO SEE YOUR STUIP LIGHTS! TURN 'EM ON, DAMN IT!"**

Roman couldn't believe he was about to do what he was about to do, but as Dean ran around in a circle, screaming, he took one last glance at Renee – looking so sad – and he knew he had to. He knew he had to get out of the car and run around and, for once, act like as big of an idiot as Dean.

Cupping his hands around his mouth, he started running in a circle and yelling as well.

 **"YOU WANT EVERYBODY TO SEE YOUR LIGHTS, SO WHY DID YOU TURN 'EM OFF? TURN ON THE LIGHTS! LIKE HE SAID THERE'S A GIRL IN THIS CAR, A REALLY GREAT GIRL, THAT SHOULD SEE THESE LIGHTS! TURN 'EM ON!"**

Together they started chanting, **"TURN 'EM ON! TURN 'EM ON! TURN 'EM ON!"** and then suddenly a feminine voice joined their refrain as she screeched, **"TURN ON THE LIGHTS! I WANT TO SEE A SEAL IN A SANTA HAT AND A DOLPHIN ELF! I'VE BEEN REALLY GOOD THIS YEAR, I PROMISE!"**

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Came from one house and then the first switch was flipped, lighting up a house two houses down as the owner yelled, "THERE, ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?!"

Splitting up the three ran around the neighborhood yelling and screaming until all the houses were lit up.

Breathing heavily, Renee twirled in a circle, laughing as a smile spread across her lips, so wide, the two men thought her face might split in half. Suddenly she launched herself at both of them and they all tumbled to the ground. Their combined groans from their backs hitting the concrete was drowned by her innocent whisper of, "It's a Christmas miracle. You guys got Candy Cane Lane to light up for me."

* * *

In this moment, both were sure, she had never looked so perfect. Underneath her red Santa hat, her choppy layers of platinum stuck out and her brown eyes were so bright it was like they, too, were powered by the very Christmas lights she was so excited to see.

" _It's a little Saint Nick...Oooo...It's a little Saint Nick...Oooo..."_ Warbled through speakers a few blocks down and if it was possible her eyes got brighter as she squealed happily, "This is my favorite Christmas song!"

" _And haulin' snow at a frightenin' speed... With a half a dozen reindeer with Rudy to lead... He's gotta wear his goggles cause the snow really flies... He's cruisin' every pad with a little surprise..._ C'mon, you guys," A pause to pout. "Sing with me! Everyone knows the words to Little Saint Nick!"

Deeper voices joined in and she danced in between them, singing, until the song was finally over. "JoJo," Just barely above a whisper. "Is going to love all the pictures I took. I can't wait to show her. And it's all because you two..." A giggle escaping tulip lips and jesus christ on a pony could she be cuter? "Bad asses," Using her 'generic boy voice' before the normal pitch returned. "Ran around like two crazy idiots yelling at everyone to turn on their lights. Why would you do that? You didn't even want to come."

It was now or never; this was the moment of truth, either they shrugged it off and they fell back into the teasing rapport that so easily developed between them or they took the chance. Deep down, where it counted most, they knew what they had to do. There wasn't any choice.

Standing in the middle of the street in a neighborhood that looked like the freaking North Pole on steroids, they couldn't deny what had been in front of them all along.

"Fuck, Nee..." Dean's gritty tone. "Don't you know? Dollface, you drive us fuckin' crazy." Hallmark certainly wouldn't be asking Dean to trademark the phrase, but she knew what he was trying to say, and her heart was suddenly lodged in her throat.

"Baby girl, don't you know by now?" Could a voice actually sound like sex? If it was possible, Renee was sure Roman's would be that voice. An all too familiar shiver raced down her spine, settling heat pooling in her stomach and arousal rushing through her veins. "We'd do anything for you. Even," That stupid smile... So perfect, lush lips curled upwards, white teeth revealed. How was she standing again? "Run around like idiots screamin' about turnin' on Christmas lights."

She couldn't help but pinch herself, cursing briefly, because this had to be a dream. This couldn't be real. They both weren't... They couldn't... She had to choose. This wasn't like Kelly Taylor declaring 'i choose me' to get out of actually choosing between Brandon and Dylan. No, this was the real world and she had to make a choice. She couldn't have both... Could she? Her heart lifted at the thought, but how would this work? Eventually, she would have to make a choice, wouldn't she?

But how could she choose?

Both of them – in their own special ways – owned her heart. How could she give one up? But... Her head was spinning and then the next thing she knew she was grounded. Sandwiched between both men, each leaving the warmest kisses against her hair, then her cheeks and her neck, and then they pulled back. Cornflower blue eyes, so perfect like a cloudless spring sky, no demons haunting, no storm on the horizon turning from clear to harsh grey and a deeper blue around the iris. Just open and honest. More than they've ever been. Then there's grey; warm around the irises like silver, so soulful and making her melt like the first fresh snow of the season.

It's almost too much, really, being looked at this way. But it's everything.

And in a way she was choosing, wasn't she? Maybe not one over the other in a traditional sense, but she was choosing; she was choosing both because in their eyes they were letting her know she could have them both and that they both wanted to have her.

"So..." So soft she can barely hear herself. "Is this real? We're really doing this whole polyandry thingy?" A shaky breath leaves trembling tulip lips. "Because if we're not, one of you better back out right now because I'm not strong enough to. I want you both, I need you both and I..."

Everything is gone, instantly, as Dean's lips come crashing against hers. It's everything – kissing him – she thought it would be; hot, intense, rough, like she's burning from the inside out. His tongue so talented and insistent those big hands caressing her, his lips moving over hers like he's trying to devour her, wanting everything she can give and wanting to give her all she can take.

Then before her eyes can open, to fully register the gravity of having Dean's lips on hers, there's Roman; swooping in at the most perfect moment, her lips barely parted, his tongue able to slip past. It's slow and languid, more sensual, just like in her dreams. But better because this is reality. One of his large hands spans the small of her back, grounding her against him and the other threads through her hair; never letting her lips stray far.

"Fuck..." Wanton and heady, ripped from her throat like a benediction. Her eyes flutter open and seriously her legs are literal jello, so how hasn't she fallen over? "This really is a Christmas miracle."


End file.
